Theres almost always someone in my seminar audiences who isnt there to learn. Hes there to preen, to advertise himself, to compete, to win. Its a shame, really, because he not only misses what is there to be learned, but he distracts everybody else, embroiling people in his Theater of the Ego. For example, he might ask a hostile question that masquerades as a sincere search for understanding: Do you really think X means Y? Where do you begin to answer that? A flat yes, sounds rude and argumentative, as does a flat no. A no, also implies that you shifted your position, or you lied. Generally, re-explaining a point you already made adds nothing, and it wastes the time of the entire group. If you overtly bring attention to the insidious nature of the question, that there is a fighting word in it; really, you seem defensive and paranoid, and you could have an open clash on your hands. Go overboard in straightening out an audience member and you run the risk of alienating everyone else, who might side with him. Let it pass, without any comment, and you seem to be ignoring the question, or to be too timid to admonish a wayward challenger. You can go the clinical route and separate the defensive portion from the genuine portion of the question. Its cerebral, but it could warn, Dont try this again. Here is how it sounds. Lets see. Did I say X is Y? I suppose I did; theyre equivalent. Do I really think so? Sure, I meant what I said. In fact, throughout this class, you can count on me to mean what I say, and that way, I wont have to waste your time by covering these points, again. Its a slam. It says, I know what youre up to. If you have a genuine question, one that perplexes everybody, cool. Please ask it. But dont bother us with pseudo-queries. Wouldnt it be nice if everyone had to take a class called, How To Take A Seminar, or How To Learn In A Group Setting? We might be able to avoid unpleasantness and get on with the all important purpose of sharing vital information in a limited time. Until then, be on your toes, and select the best possible strategy that will enable you to get back on track, and discourage future attempts to derail your session. |
